Monday, May 25, 2009

Chelpark, HB, Camel, Milton and one helluva nostalgia.

[Though this was never a part of my growing up years, I wish it were]

When the last time you went to school, was 13 years back, you know it was way too long ago. When school is where people who call you aunty go to, you know it was very long ago. Yet, I have never really been very nostalgic about it; perhaps, the fact that I went to 9 schools in 12 years made me a little wary about the whole thing, if I may say so.

My memories are so scattered. Back in class X, I couldn't walk the corridor, the same old corridor, with a friend, the same old and laugh over how, 9 years back, right here we fought over a lost crayon. I didn't know what my class XI crush looked like when he was 7. I didn't see my favorite teacher age. I never chanced upon my 11 year old craft project. My best friend in class IX, never made fun of my pigtails. Class XII farewell party didn't mean much.

However, yesterday I was missing the whole school thing,, after seeing my neighbor and her 9-old daughter at work, covering the notebooks with brown paper, sticking labels – name, roll no., class, section, subject, school... incredible.

I miss going to school, doing homework, having a class teacher who would teach us all five subjects, having a recess and a 9-3 routine I missed having a pencil box full of erasers, pencils and one ink pen. I miss, trying to miss the PT classes, I miss exchanging lunch boxes, I miss the morning assembly, I miss distributing éclairs on my birthday, I miss hating the first girl, I miss loving May & June, I miss the bus, I miss the window seat.

I miss my school. Maybe, all nine of them

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Don't you do that to me.

Last time I felt so let down was when I had my first slice of pizza. It was hardly as cheesy, as crusty, as divine, as whatever as I was promised it would be. However, this time round I feel utterly crushed, cheated and very sad on a whole, perhaps because of the time and patience that went into it.

I've very recently learnt that my power point presentations aren't really going to get me anywhere. A shame, since I've really perfected my PPT skills over the years. I am now what you call quite a pro at it. After being bullied by my superiors and other PPT pros for not having propah skills, I made sure it was at the tippy top of my must do lists.

And now, nothing has changed for me. No corner room, no 30 per cent hike, no paid vacations. Just a 'good job' at the end of each of those fancy presentations, c'mon that wouldn't suffice. Whatever happened to that promise that I will be in a different league altogether? That the way I look at things and the way the world looks at me, will change. What happened?

A bad concept still needs a rework, a boring headline still sucks; a pretty slide, I've realized, does nothing for it. Damn it.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Très exotique. But no, thank you.

[I am coming back to you]

Celery sticks dipped in low fat sour cream dip with blueberry flavoured soy milk on the side? No thank you. Though it features on my list of phrases I would like to ban, I absolutely have to use it here... been there and done that. And hating it.

I have tried every (whatever my swish departmental store offers, or my visiting New Yorker friend brings me) exotic ingredients, antioxidant rich drinks, gluten free grains, flavourful sauces, foreign veges, etcetera. Once into a departmental store, I turn into this biggest sucker ever. Sucker for all things of foreign origin. As fellow buyers look at me, admiringly, I keep piling my basket with a rare finesse. Almost as if I grew up on a diet of artichokes and hummus. Heee heee :D.

Fish sauce, chilly oil, tofu, celery, olive oil, kiwis, rosemary, oregano, chilly flakes, cream cheese I have tried them all. While tofu tastes like stale eraser, fish sauce is too pungent in a very nasty way, and celery tastes like nothing. Olive oil nourishes the skin (I agree) but makes food tasty, it does not. And cream cheese, tastes so much like paneer (cottage cheese). Oregano, thyme and rosemary do nothing to steamed veges. Neither do Schezwan peppercorns. And no, I cannot imagine tulsi on my pizza.

Quite like the tofu stir fry, my exotic sojurn has been pretty bland so far. And I am in no mood to take this any further.

Pass me the pudina lassi, will ya?

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

They made you go Awww... but will the zoozoos make you spend?

I love them. All of them. Super creative, brilliant execution, so, so adorable. They are everywhere, and everyone's talking about them. But the point is will you press those numbers that they ask you to and get dating tips, prayer songs, beauty alerts, stock information, etcetera? Or if you are not a Vodafone customer, will you become one, enticed by their array of services?

While these cute egg headed white humanoids have of course taken care of the Branding and the buzz, what about the figures? Will this one and a half month long (during the IPL period) campaign make an impact on Vodafone's targets? Given the fact that, Vodafone is already big and known for its creative concepts and branding initiatives, what's the point? More so, at a time like this, When most brand managers everywhere (at least where I am, they are) are freezing ad spends. Maybe this is aggressive marketing after all. Maybe this is what works. But aren't we all discussing how cute these ads are and how smart their advertising guys (O&M) are. What's the ROI, I am thinking.

Dunno. Maybe it's too much to decipher for an obscure copywriter from an obscure advertising agency.

However, Zoozoo xoxo.

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

I rest my case

I have been writing way too many long copy ads, so this sudden fetish for bullet points. And here, in no particular order are few things that I've figured out during my x years on earth -

a. Sign up for a crazily expensive gym, and you are sure to never miss it.

b. Staying close to family and friends keeps you sane.

c. Underdog is a good thing.

d. Hostel roommates are special.

e. Randomness is good.

f. Sorry doesn't mean a thing.

g. Neither do promises.

h. Not everyone can perfect that smoky eye look.

i. Everyone can try that much harder though.

j. You are not as good as you think you are.

k. You are not as bad either.

l. Secrets are meant to be secret.

m. A NO or a YES, often saves a lot of trouble.