silent night, biright lights and some perspective

the festive season while making you feel very festive, also gets me thinking. thinking about things, little things, and things slightly bigger - like say one's attitude towards life and people.

so as plum cakes, secret santa games, wish lists, red and white dress codes, do the rounds, so do thoughts like, 'what am i?'; 'is it the real version of me'; 'is this what i want to become?'; 'what lies ahead of me'; and 'am i happy with the version of me?', etcetera.

the last thought stayed with me more than i would have liked it to, and then it got me thinking. thinking hard. well, no matter what femina says [yeah, i browse through it sometimes, very, very rarely], there are, at last count, 47 things that i would want to change about myself. so, i am not at peace with the version of me.


so what's that thing about me that irks me the most? well, it would be my tendency of trying to fit in. in different groups and in different moods. so, on this beautiful Christmas eve evening, as i listen to silent night, holy night, see pretty little stars in gold, silver and pink, and eat my body weight in plum cake, i decide. i decide to no more trying to fit in. it's so much easier to make one happy than trying to appease around hundred thousand people, that is if i live up to ninety. and yes that one i was talking about would be moi. :)


merry christmas everyone.

Dear Santa…

If you are looking at gifting me something this year, gift me time. Whole lot of it. Time to do what I love, like and enjoy. Time to read more, watch more television [a woman can have a few vices you know], to run more, spend more time with family and friends, cook more, and yeah do some real travelling. And yeah, loads of happiness and cheer.

I have never believed in Santa, not even at age seven. Let's say, Santa did't quite feature in our Christmas celebrations, 25th of December was all about cakes and cousins, and ten days of respite from school. I was that kid, who knew there's no Santa, but played along anyway.

At the risk of sounding pretentious, I now say, I want to believe in Santa, the chimney, the stockings... the whole thing. Maybe because now my wishlist is longer than it ever was.

Merry Christmas!