Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Bored and betrayed; can I have my money back?

Beautiful people abound. Estée Lauder and Marc Jacobs everywhere. And so were shiitake and sashimi diet ideas. But stuff that I could use? Nah, nothing at all.

I couldn't unleash the diva in me. I have failed to turn my man into my slave. Could never be the seductress at work. Haven't yet figured out why something that works for Kate Moss, doesn't work for me. And I still know only 1 way of making it big at work – slogging it out. So, I want my money back. And yes, the time too.

A certain magazine for the fun, fearless female promised me all that and so much more. It promised to be the chic sister I never had, the impossibly comforting aunt, and the confidante who would help me rule my world, if not the world.

Sample this...
Make your next door hottie fall for you by this weekend.
Live the celeb life on your meager budget.
How to totally rock on your first date.
The quintessential quiz – Are you a diva/doormat/drama queen /whatever.
10 signs he is into you / not into you / cheating on you / gay.
50 reasons to fall in love with yourself / your ex / your friend's lover / your friend's ex.
25 reasons why you must spend your lifetime's savings on a pair of leopard skin stilettos.

That's what I read, one issue after another, since 1998 December; with slight variations in headline colours and fonts.

Will they print this crummy stuff for the next ten years too? Maybe, maybe not; frankly, I couldn't care less.


  1. i read a whole lot of bodybuilding magazines, and since the science doesn't change on a weekly basis - they end up being cosmo equivalents for men - total crap

  2. Awesome read, keep writing rytes.

    And i think i have some clue about who this unknown indian outsourcing worker might be!